My phone had very little battery left and since I was in London and I knew I would need it in the evening to find a train time I turned it off for a few hours. When I turned my phone back on it started buzzing like crazy as the text messages came rolling in, which is uncommon. I started reading them......all from Hubby and each getting more desperate to reach me. Finally I read words that took my breath away and sent a numbing sensation through my body as tears burst to my eyes, "Jen is dead."
I am sure that you can see why I have put off writing this blog post, no one ever expects to lose a sibling so young and in the prime of their life. I quickly made contact with John and tried to make sense of the situation. Hubby didn't have many details yet and was still in shock as to how he heard that his sister had passed away. Sometimes being as far away as we are we are the last to find out about important things.... The details came later and we learned that Jen had passed from complications due to pneumonia. Pneumonia? Really? Didn't people stop dying from that in like the 1800's? Nope. The idea to me is still unfathomable. We are devastated.
You know that when you move over sea's that you will be leaving friends and family behind for a while, but you never really expect that the goodbye hug you just gave would be your last. Had I known that the hug I gave to Jen the night we left would be our last I would have squeezed the air out of her and smattered her cheeks with kisses and tears. But it was just a hug, the kind that says "I'll be seeing you sooner than later." To me it doesn't seem real. It can't be. The idea that I will not be seeing Jen in this life again is like I said before, truly unfathomable.
We were able to pull together enough resources to fly John home for the funeral which he was privileged to speak at. We were sad that we could not muster the resources to all make it, but we knew Jen would understand, she was always understanding. Hubby flew home exhausted, sad, and still in a state of shock. It was a blessing that he was able to see Jen before the cremation and that he was able to spend time with his family, an opportunity I would never begrudge him. John was pleased with the services and grateful that he was able to say goodbye to his sister and friend.
Jen left behind two beautiful sons, her BFF/Mom, siblings, parents, nephews, nieces, and other close friends, but then again if you were Jen's friend you felt like you were her close friend..... that's the kind of friend she was. This is not her obituary, but I do want to recall a few things that I love about Jen and that I will miss. Jen is infectiously funny, optimistic, and very very real. No false pretense. Jen always looked perfect and I think she had a diet coke quite possibly super glued to her hand.....rarely saw her sans one. I will miss Jen at the family gatherings sharing her thorough and honest opinion and randomly belching out the corner of her mouth. Jen loved and accepted freely, no strings attached. Jen carefully protected the people she loved and opened her heart to any who needed a friend.
I have many great memories, belly laughs, and in a large family setting moments of encouraging side glances during a few awkward moments or heated discussions. Jen and I had a lot in common, we are both furry, sparkly, pink creatures that love all things make-up and girly. We were both SYTYCD dancing Diva's and loved to chat fashion. I will miss the glorious bright energy and sunshine that Jen brought with her when she entered the room and I will miss her randomly dropping in to say hello.
I love you Jen and I know that we WILL see each other again. In my religious faith we believe that we can be together as families eternally. When we die we will be resurrected and reunited. This is a comforting knowledge and I know that we will be sipping our respective soda's (me being a Diet Pepsi girl) and belly laughing again. My sweet sister, I will see you again.
